Though we often don't remember our dreams, there are those vivid dreams that startle us and stick with us long after we open our eyes.
Though many people believe dreams are just our brains processing data, there is an alternative explanation for them: dreams are the universe's way of telling us important things.
One of the most common dreams people experience is a dream that involves an ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend. You may have just broken up or been separated for years. Regardless, here this person is, inside your dreams, interacting with you as if you never broke up or breaking your heart all over again.
What are the meanings of these dreams?
Things to know
- Dreams about an ex are rarely about them but rather what else is happening in the dream.
- When you dream about kissing and hugging your ex, it could indicate that you're missing something in your life.
- Dreaming about your ex could be the universe's way of telling you that you are lonely, unhappy, or tied to something you need to let go of.
To help you discover the universe's message within these dreams, we'll be diving into these issues:
- How To Understand The Spiritual Meanings Of Your Dreams
- Interpreting Different Dreams About Your Ex
- Why Do You Dream About Your Ex?
- Be Open To The Spiritual Meaning Of Dreams
How To Understand The Spiritual Meanings Of Your Dreams
Many dreams have deeper, spiritual meanings that may or may not seem obvious to us. This can be especially true when you dream about an ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend. It isn’t just that you miss them or that you are reliving the breakup — your subconscious mind is trying to tell you something!
So, if you are going to find out the spiritual meaning of dreaming about your ex, you’re going to have to look at much more than just their presence.
As you wake up, ask yourself these questions to begin the search for a deeper meaning to your dreams:
- What’s going on in the dream with my ex?
- What does my ex say to me?
- Do we interact with one another? Do we hug or kiss?
- What do I see my ex doing?
- What is my ex wearing in my dream? Is there anything different about them?
- Are there other people in the dream as well? What are they doing?
- How do I feel upon waking up?
- How often am I having these dreams?
When you interpret this information, it may help if you write it down in a dream journal or notebook. It may also help if you keep track of anything that happens during the day on each of the dates you wind up dreaming about your ex — your daily life could be connected.
Interpreting Different Dreams About Your Ex
A dream isn't always about the people we see but rather how we interact with them. Through activities and different events, our subconscious mind shows us what it wants us to see. Whether we understand it or not is another story entirely.
There are many dream interpretations of what it means when an ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend shows up in your dreams.
However, these are the symbolic meanings for some of the most common ways a past lover shows up in a dream:
Dreaming about your ex kissing you
Dreaming about kissing your ex may not sound like it has a spiritual meaning. It may seem like you’re just reliving the past or just still physically attracted to this former lover. However, there’s more to this dream than you’d think.
For example, it could be your unconscious mind’s way of processing the fact that you no longer have an intimate partner in your life. Your brain may be dealing with the loss of that special person and not know what to do with the grief you feel.
After all, our partners are often the people we trust and connect with the most — and not just physically. We usually develop emotional, spiritual, and mental intimacy with our partners on top of physical intimacy. This loss can be a lot to deal with, and it takes time.
Alternatively, dreams that involve kissing your ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend could hold the key to what you like in a partner. In this case, it’s not just about the kiss but everything else happening before, during, and after that magical dream moment.
Evaluating the deeper meaning of your dream in this way could give you insight that will help future relationships. You may even learn different things about yourself that you never knew.
Dreaming about your ex hugging you
In dreams, hugging isn't always what it looks like. Hugs in dreams are usually your unconscious mind trying to tell you that you are missing something in your life that you desire.
Perhaps, you are seeking the type of love life you shared with your ex-husband, wife, or serious partner. You could also wish for something your ex gave you to reappear in your everyday life. This could be a physical item, or it could be more what they offered you emotionally.
Sometimes, the hug isn't so much about the romantic relationship you shared with the person previously, but rather the idea of closeness and connection to someone. Or, it could just as easily be your mind's way of telling you to set aside the past and make amends with your ex.
Dreaming about your ex cheating
If you’re dreaming about your ex-lover cheating on you, it could be your subconscious mind’s way of dealing with any lingering insecurity you’ve carried out of your former relationship. Perhaps you always worried that your ex would cheat (or maybe they did), and you are still trying to heal those negative emotions of insecurity and fear.
This can be difficult to pick up on and even harder to work through. However, you will need to process this insecurity if you want to have success in your current or future relationships.
Or, seeing your ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend cheating in a dream could be your brain’s way of connecting an experience you’re familiar with to an unrelated form of insecurity you are currently experiencing.
Perhaps you are worried about work or an upcoming event. Or maybe you feel insecure in your current relationship. Using your ex as a symbol for this emotion could simply be your mind’s way of helping you work out something going on in your real life.
Dreaming about an ex you no longer talk to
When most people go through an especially painful breakup, they go no contact with their ex. So, the last thing they want to do is dream about their ex-lover. So what is the symbolic meaning of dreaming about an ex you haven't talked to in months?
Well, it is possible that you still have unresolved feelings about your ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend. If that's the case, it could explain why you are dreaming about them.
Your relationship may have ended suddenly or on bad terms. When this happens, we often hold onto the things we wish we would have said or the questions that were never answered. This emotional baggage takes a toll on us and weighs us down, so we are unable to move on.
Dreaming of this past relationship is your mind's way of trying to help you move on with your life and, eventually, a new relationship. But first, you must let go of these unresolved emotions or lingering wishes with an ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend.
Why Do You Dream About Your Ex?
Unfortunately, dreams are a tough nut to crack sometimes. Even though you are focusing on the fact that you are dreaming about your ex, it could have absolutely nothing to do with your ex… or it could have everything to do with them. There’s no way to know for sure.
However, there are some other deeper meanings to dreaming about your ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend than their actual connection:
Dreaming about your ex because you feel lonely
Sometimes dreams that involve an ex-lover are more of a clue into what our inner self is feeling below the surface. These are often negative feelings that we don't always pick up on as we go about our everyday lives like nothing is wrong.
However, your dreams know differently.
You may be dreaming about your ex not because you miss them but because you simply feel lonely in your waking life. Maybe you lost friends or didn't feel especially close to many people, or maybe you just lost touch with people as your relationship consumed your life.
Well, look at this dream as a way of telling you to get back out there and rekindle lost relationships with friends and family members. You'll feel a lot better once you have people by your side and aren't as alone.
Dreaming about your ex as a sign to end something
Your ex is your ex for a reason — you broke up. You may have unresolved issues or still harbor romantic feelings for them, which could make them appear in your dreams.
However, some of the possible meanings to dreaming about your ex have nothing to do with those things at all. They are more about the situation rather than the person.
Depending on the circumstances of your breakup, you may be dreaming about your ex because your spirit is trying to tell you that you need to break up with someone or something else.
You may feel like your dead-end job is no longer even worth paying the bills, or you may be unsatisfied with your current partner. The possibilities are endless.
So, how can you tell if this is the spiritual meaning of dreaming about your ex? Well, you won’t know for sure until you start paying attention to the details of the dream and do some soul searching about your current life.
Dreaming about your ex because you miss a part of your past
When we pick up the broken pieces after an especially painful breakup, we often become new people. This is usually a good thing. It gives us a chance to rebuild and start over in as many different ways as we want.
However, starting over isn’t always easy, nor is it always what we truly want. Instead, we may yearn for parts of our past that we can’t possibly reclaim (not including our ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend).
Your subconscious mind may be trying to show you parts of your past that it knows you miss, but it does so by presenting your ex. Perhaps the attributes of yourself you are missing are somehow connected to the relationship you shared, but then again, maybe not.
Alternatively, this dream could be your mind’s way of shedding the past so you can move towards growth. Perhaps you need to let go of the low self-esteem your previous relationship caused so you can become the best possible version of yourself.
Regardless, your ex may not be the focus of the dream — they may just be a spiritual representation of your past life.
Dreaming about your ex because you feel uncertain about your current situation
Are you in a romantic relationship with someone new? Did you just get a big promotion? Have you decided to go back to school?
Whatever big news you have going on in your everyday life could be a cause for concern. Or, at least your brain sees it that way.
Dreaming about your ex-boyfriend or girlfriend during the beginning stages of a new relationship or new time in your life could feel unsettling. However, it’s merely your brain’s way of telling you about its reservations about everything that is happening.
Your mind could be saying, “What if we get hurt again?” or “What if it isn’t meant to be?” Unfortunately, our unconscious mind often reveals our deepest fears during the hours in which we sleep.
But before you panic about the deeper meaning of this dream about your ex, think about how far you’ve come. These fears may be justified, or they may not. Unfortunately, you can’t do anything if you don’t trust yourself enough to make the right decisions.
Dreaming about your ex because you need to find yourself
When we get swept up in romantic feelings, we can sometimes lose ourselves along the way. However, it often happens so slowly that we don’t even realize we’ve lost ourselves until it's too late. Then, when we go through a breakup, we lose ourselves even more.
Sometimes, dreaming about an ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend is a spiritual meaning unrelated to them but more to ourselves. It could be that your brain wants you to reconnect with parts of yourself that either existed within your past relationship or before you even got together with your ex.
When we dream about the parts of ourselves we miss, our brains often personify these aspects of us as other people. Usually, these people either connect back to the time in our lives when we lost that part of ourselves, or that person also holds the attributes we’re looking for.
If you notice this, ask yourself: “What am I missing?” Then, look for ways to explore those parts of yourself again. In time, those dreams will fade away, and you will feel restored.
Be Open To The Spiritual Meaning Of Dreams
There are books and gifted advisors waiting to help you interpret the spiritual meaning of your dreams, even when those dreams include an ex-partner. However, dreams are not always about what other people see them as, but rather what stuck out to you as it played before you.
You may wake up with a clear sign as to what the universe is trying to tell you with this most recent dream involving an ex-girlfriend or ex-boyfriend. Then again, you may wake up feeling even more confused than you did before you went to sleep. Either way, there is a hidden meaning in each and every dream — you just need to allow yourself to be open to that spiritual message.
If you have no idea what your dreams involving your ex mean, don't worry. It usually takes time to decipher messages from the universe.
However, you can do things to make it easier to discover the spiritual meaning of your dreams. You can write them down, meditate on them, and try to put yourself back there so you can evaluate all the clues. Then, with your newly found insight and a bit of patience, the universe will gift you with an answer.
So, what is the spiritual meaning of dreaming about your ex? Well, it's time for you to get out there in the real world and unlock that hidden meaning for yourself.