Can An Average Looking Woman Find Love? Yes! Here's Why

Society has us all convinced that our physical appearance is the most important thing when we're trying to find the love of our lives. So much so, that many of us spend hours upon hours looking at hot guys and girls as we try to figure out what we can change about ourselves to look more desirable.

We spend thousands of dollars on makeup, hair treatments, and cosmetic surgeries each year to make ourselves more attractive and desirable. But is all of that really necessary? Can an average-looking woman find love? And if so, how?

Things to know

  • The answer is yes, you can absolutely find love. Physical appearance is not the only factor that makes someone attractive, other attributes such as a sense of humor, confidence, a lovely smile and empathy also play a role.
  • Being an average-looking woman can have its own perks such as being appreciated for more than just your looks and being more approachable.
  • Society's emphasis on physical attractiveness is not always accurate and it is important to understand and take advantage of the other attributes that make you attractive.

There's still lots to explore, here's what we'll be looking at in this article:

Can Average-Looking People Find Love?

To say that most people care about their physical appearance is an understatement. Researchers say that women spend nearly an hour on their appearance each day because they are highly critical of their appearance.

Most of the time, though, we're far harder on ourselves than we really need to be.

The way we see ourselves in the mirror or in photos is rarely the way others see us. In many cases, we may find ourselves unattractive, while a man who walks by in the grocery store may later tell his friends he saw a pretty woman in the produce aisle.

Even if you don't think you belong with the beautiful people we see in magazines, you can absolutely find love. It's all a matter of understanding what makes you appear attractive and taking advantage of it.

But first, you need to know what actually makes someone attractive because it's not just their physical appearance.

What Makes A Person Attractive?

Chances are you've heard the phrase "there's so much more to a person than meets the eye." Well, as silly as it sounds, there's some truth to this colloquialism. In many cases, it's not just facial attractiveness that makes you appealing to others — it's a variety of physical attributes and personality traits.

So, what do the experts say makes a person attractive? Well, it may not be what you'd think.

A sense of humor

We all love to laugh. So, naturally, most people find a great sense of humor attractive. If you can make a man laugh on your first date, then chances are he's going to want to spend a lot more time with you. (Bonus points if you also have a cute laugh.)


Confidence can boost your outlook on life, but past research shows it can also boost your overall attractiveness in the eyes of a potential partner. People often see low self-esteem as a turn-off and confidence as far more attractive.

Keep in mind that there's a difference between confidence and arrogance. Arrogant people are not attractive — they are cocky and self-centered. However, a little bit of confidence goes a long way towards reeling the guys in.

A lovely smile

You're never fully dressed without a smile, and people will notice. Men find women who smile more attractive than those who don't. So, even if you're an average-looking woman, you may get more dates if you're willing to smile every once in a while.


Physical appearance definitely helps make the first impressions for us. However, it's often the social interactions we have with people that help us win them over. If you display empathy and kindness towards others, chances are a man will see you are more attractive than a woman who doesn't.

This is because most people want a romantic partner who will support them and care for them in the good times and bad. Usually, a supportive husband or wife is one who respects their partner, treats them well, and empathizes with them on those harder days.


There may still be a wage gap between men and women, but ambition can help us continue to tackle this issue and others we face in the workplace. However, that go-getter attitude will serve you in more places than just work. It will also help you appear more attractive to those you're interested in dating.

Young women who are ambitious appear passionate, determined and driven to succeed. This offers many great qualities to a future spouse, which means you're more appealing than someone who is seen as a slacker. This is especially true in the United States, where our careers are often one of the sole measurements of life success.

The Perks Of Being An Average Looking Woman

Society has convinced us that physical attractiveness is the end all be all to relationship success. However, that's not really the case. You may not always see it, but there are perks to being an average-looking woman, including these positives:

1. People appreciate you for more than your looks.

When we see an attractive woman, we comment on her appearance but notice little else about her. When you’re just an average-looking woman, people are more likely to notice other, more important, qualities. They may appreciate your sense of humor or your intelligence. It’s just nice to be appreciated for more than a pretty face.

2. Prospective partners find you more approachable.

Guys say they want a hot girl, but most of them are scared to approach someone they see as out of their league. So, for the average-looking guy, plain girls are easier to talk to and make the first move with.

This can be especially important if you’re trying online dating since people decide whether or not they want to reach out strictly based on your appearance.

3. You don’t get hit on everywhere you go.

Beautiful women are often objectified, which makes them a constant target for cat calls and cheap pickup lines everywhere they go. When you have an average face and body, you can grocery shop and enjoy a night out on the town with friends in peace.

4. You’re more likely to experience career success.

Many people believe that attractiveness helps you climb the career ladder. However, one recent study found that isn’t always the case. There are many cases where being average actually helps you because it makes you more approachable.

Furthermore, there are some career fields where being “attractive” makes you seem less dedicated to your work, meaning a less attractive man or woman may be more likely to land that promotion.

5. You know how to make the first move.

An attractive woman typically doesn’t make the first move because everyone wants to talk to her. Unfortunately, this means she may not know how to get a guy’s attention when she’s interested.

If you’re more on the average end of the attractiveness scale, then you probably know a thing or two about making the first move, and this can be a real benefit in the modern dating world.

6. You connect with people on a deeper level.

Average-looking people have higher levels of empathy, compassion, and interpersonal skills than those who are considered to be highly attractive. This makes it easier to connect with people on a deeper, more meaningful level. Emotional connections are what help romantic partners stay together.

Stop Pretending And Start Looking For Love

Most of us falsely believe we're ugly women incapable of finding true love. However, research studies and psychologists prove time and time again that it's not what's on the outside but rather the inside that really matters. There's so much more to attraction than our physical appearance, and it's time we all recognize that.

Younger and older women alike can be average looking and still land the perfect man. All it takes is some self-esteem building and determination to find the one who is destined for you.

You don't need a nose job or perfectly straight teeth, and you definitely don't have to be a celebrity. You just need to recognize your strengths and show them off, much like you would for a job interview.

So, show off those lovely eyes and gorgeous smile. Pull out your best jokes and share your latest career success. Appreciate his talents, and shower the man you're interested in with kindness and empathy. At the end of the day, your efforts will pay off.

Don't lose hope if you don't find the one right away - it takes time. And, no matter what people say or your internal monologue tries to convince you, remember this: every woman is a beautiful woman - even you.

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