Forget blind dates and dating apps; the epic love story you're after could be right under your nose.
Could you be missing out on all the signals he's sending from the friend zone?
Things to know
- If the way he treats you has changed, his feelings have likely changed too.
- Provided you like him too, making the transition from friends to lovers might result in a deeper, more satisfying relationship.
- If you don't feel the same way, your friendship isn't automatically doomed. With time and effort, your friendship can survive.
Hang tight. You're about to find out. Here's exactly what we'll be looking at to help you figure out if your male friend has feelings for you:
- How Can You Tell If A Guy Friend Likes You Romantically?
- Signs Your Male Friend Has Feelings For You
- How To Know If You Like A Guy More Than A Friend
- How To Admit Your Feelings To Your Male Friend
- How To Let Him Down Gently
How Can You Tell If A Guy Friend Likes You Romantically?
To find out if a guy friend likes you romantically, look out for these typical signals:
Changes in his behavior
One of the best ways to tell if a guy friend likes you romantically is to look out for changes in his behavior.
Emotions motivate behavior. So, if he has developed romantic feelings for you, his actions will no doubt shift in response. Has he become more considerate?
Is he reaching out more? Make a note of any shifts in the way he behaves around you. Is he more shy or nervous? Has he suddenly become awkward or goofy?
Changes in body language
As it occurs on an unconscious level, body language can provide insight into a person's true thoughts, emotions, and intentions. In fact, non-verbal cues are considered more reliable than verbal communication.
If you want to know how he feels about you, look for small changes in his body language. Does he stand closer? Do you catch him staring more often? Perhaps the way he speaks to you has changed. The more changes you can spot, the better.
Changes in your relationship dynamic
Going from seeing each other once a month to spending every day together definitely points to a change in your relationship dynamic.
If you've been friends for a reasonable amount of time, you can probably pinpoint when things started to change between you. Was it after you were there for him during a rough patch?
Maybe you took a trip together, and that set things in motion. Perhaps nothing major happened at all; your relationship simply developed organically because of compatibility and a strong emotional connection.
Signs Your Male Friend Has Feelings For You
How do you know if he's more than a friend? Here are some of the biggest signs that he might have romantic feelings for you:
He never leaves your side
He spends so much time at your place that he's part of the furniture now. Whether it's dropping by with your favorite snacks or offering to help you with some mundane household task, he can't seem to keep away.
If you or everyone else in your life just thinks he should move in already, he's in deep.
He takes you out on dates
You go out often, and anyone would think they're actual dates. He gets dressed up, treats you like a queen, and gets the tab — every single time. These are all subtle signs that he sees you as more than just a female friend. He's crushing on you hard and waiting to see if the feeling is mutual.
He wants to spend quality time with you
Does he brush off the guys to spend quality time with you? Is his focus on you the entire time you're out with mutual friends? If he's by your side even on major public holidays and your mom considers him a part of the family, he definitely has feelings for you.
You have deep conversations
Spending time together on a regular basis might not mean much if things between you are casual. He might seriously enjoy your company or see you as a close friend.
However, if you tend to have very deep conversations and offer each other emotional support, there might be something stronger there.
Emotional vulnerability definitely points to romantic attraction. If he confides in you, he values and trusts your judgment. He also wants to build a deeper connection with you.
He's your unofficial protector
Men are hard-wired to want to protect their loved ones. This means he will go out of his way to help you. You can also rely on him to be there for you when you need him.
Whether it's checking your gas or dealing with a shady landlord on your behalf, if he's willing to go the extra mile for you, he's smitten.
His body language gives him away
Lingering glances and intense eye contact are clear signs of sexual tension. If he occasionally flashes you a look that makes your heart race, he wants you.
His facial expression is a dead giveaway too. Look out for a joyful animated look that's reserved only for you. If you mean the world to him, his face will light up whenever he sees you.
Take note of his overall stance when you're together. If he tends to stand tall with his whole body facing you, he's saying you've got all his attention. He's also subconsciously trying to make himself appear more attractive.
Mirroring you is another big one. If he's copying your gestures or using the same words as you, he's into you.
Everyone else sees it
Despite the strong gut feeling, you're skeptical that there's something more between you. While you might not be convinced, everyone around you seems to see it. Your best friend swears you'd make the cutest couple. Even your family members ship you. Maybe it's time to consider that they might be onto something.
His dating life is non-existent or off limits
You know everything about him, and he tells you everything except for who he's dating. When you bring it up, he's quick to offer an evasive answer or change the topic.
Come to think of it, in the time you've been friends, he's been blissfully single. He doesn't seem interested in any other woman but you. Let's face it, with all the time and attention he devotes to you, there's really no way he could maintain a healthy relationship with anyone.
He compliments you often
He can't seem to stop raving about your cooking skills. He doesn't miss an opportunity to tell you how beautiful you look (even in sweats). Compliments are usually a sign of romantic interest. So, if he's going out of his way to sing your praises, he's smitten.
He texts all the time
We don't typically text our friends all day long. We usually text a silly meme or two, then make plans. So if he's constantly reaching out and texting you the whole day, he might be into you. To know for sure, you may want to look for more signs.
Pay attention to your conversations. Are they deep and engaging? If his responses are thoughtful and prompt, he's definitely invested.
He makes excuses to touch you
Making excuses to touch you is another giveaway. If his feelings were strictly platonic, getting in your personal space and making physical contact here would be the last thing on his mind. So next time he pulls you in for a hug, see if he lingers. If he does, he's into you.
He's interested in everything about you
If a man has feelings for you, he'll want to know every little thing about you. He'll ask about your hopes, dreams, and future plans. So, if he's paying close attention to your career, dating life, and random things like your favorite color, he's into you.
If he's asking you questions about your love life, he might be interested in you romantically. Plus, if he seems to get a little agitated when you bring up potential dates, he's jealous.
Jealousy is an obvious sign that he sees you as more than a friend. If his feelings were platonic, he wouldn't fixate on you spending time with potential romantic interests.
He's all over your social media
If he's suddenly taken an interest in liking and commenting on your social media posts, he's trying to get your attention. It's also possible that he's hinting at his true feelings and trying to show the world how close you are. His strange behavior may also be a sneaky way to ward off potential suitors.
How To Know If You Like A Guy More Than A Friend
Maybe he's not the only one dealing with confusing new feelings. Could you be falling for him too? Here's how to tell:
You're physically attracted to him
If you're lusting after him a little, your feelings have officially crossed over into romantic territory.
Romantic love tends to involve a desire for a deeper, more multi-dimensional connection. It goes beyond physical and sexual attraction: do you want a deeper emotional connection too?
You can't get him off your mind
Romantic love is an addictive cocktail of feel-good hormones. Some of these hormones can keep the object of your affection on your mind all the time. So, if you can't seem to stop thinking about him, you're head over heels too.
You see yourself sharing a life with him
Does every moment you spend together make you envision a life with him? Maybe you're starting to notice that all the other romantic prospects in your life simply don't measure up.
If you feel that he has all the qualities you desire in a romantic partner, you're in deep too. Plus, if the thought of him being with someone else suddenly makes you queasy, he's more than a friend.
You value his happiness
You're willing to go the extra mile to make sure he's happy and taken care of. When he’s down, you’re determined to do anything to cheer him up. It's only natural to want what’s best for him; he's your friend, after all. However, this type of behavior points to compassionate love and is an indication of strong feelings.
You can't get enough of him
It's one thing for him to constantly want to be around you. If you feel the same way, your feelings have likely deepened too. When we're enamored with someone, we can't help but want to spend every minute with them — it's all part of the attachment process.
You feel safe with him
Reflect on how he makes you feel. If there's no one else in the world you trust more and if you can be yourself around him, you share a deep emotional connection. Feeling safe in his presence is a telltale sign that you trust and respect him.
How To Admit Your Feelings To Your Male Friend
If all the signs say he likes you too, you probably won't be waiting long for him to make his move. If he's dragging his feet and you want to shoot your shot, I've got good news for you: the rewards may be worth the risk.
Romantic relationships built on a strong foundation of friendship are said to be deeper and more satisfying.
Here's how to let him know you have feelings for him too:
If you don't want to jump the gun, this is probably the best approach. Showing him how you feel might encourage him to finally make a move. Focus on conveying interest and attracting him emotionally through your words, actions, and body language.
Reciprocate his energy and be just as invested as he is. So if he's keeping close or being touchy, follow suit. Flash him a sultry look every now and again. Since men aren't that good at reading women's body language, you might have to be less subtle to get the message across.
Drop some not-so-subtle hints
He isn't going to hazard shooting his shot if he knows that you're unavailable. If you're single, let him know you're looking.
Match his availability and tell him that you enjoy his company. It wouldn't hurt to drop a few hints that you find him attractive or that you admire the man he is.
Test the waters
When you're friends with someone, confessing your feelings comes with the risk of making things awkward or affecting your friendship.
Subtly testing the waters is a great place to start. Jokingly flirt with him; if he shuts you down, it's best to back off. If he flirts back, then keep it going and let the tension build.
Ease into it
If you prefer a more direct approach, try not to make a big deal out of it. That way, if you've misread the signals, things won't be too awkward between you. Simply invite him over and when the mood is right, let him know how you feel.
It might feel like a cop-out, but telling him how you feel via text might take the pressure off both of you. Lead with how much you appreciate him, and then confess. Try not to press him for a response; give him time to get back to you.
How To Let Him Down Gently
Okay, so maybe you're thinking, "My guy friend has feelings for me, but I don't. Friendship over". Although this is a stressful situation, try not to make any hasty decisions.
While research suggests that friendships often end after a confession of unrequited love, with compassion and maturity, some friendships recover. If he hasn't brought it up or made a move yet, wait until he does. When he does, let him down gently; you might be able to salvage your friendship.