Hi reader, nice ass.
Some of you might have taken that as a compliment, but most of you probably thought that was a pretty jarring way to start an article - let alone a conversation.
The first impression is significant in many walks of life, and it's no different when we date online.
Online dating is at the absolute forefront of modern romance; we've got an endless number of potential hookups and relationships waiting at our fingertips. Nevertheless, one single (but mammoth) thing stands in the way of you and a great date: the first message.
You only get so much space on tinder for a riveting bio, and the pressure is on if you're a woman with a bumble profile.
The tedious 'hey' has gotten old, 'what you doing?' is dull, and like we've established, 'nice ass' is less of a compliment and more like a cringeworthy mating call.
The time has come to get some real game under your belt and stop letting those matches go to waste. Welcome to your first day of making that first message count. Without further ado, here are some of the best online dating opening lines you can use:
Best Online Dating Opening Lines
A great opening message is going to depend on the person you're messaging. It's worth taking a second to analyze your matches' profile: see if you can decipher their sense of humor, what kinds of things they like and a rough idea to what kind of person they may be.
There's no shame in experimenting with those first messages on whatever dating site you use to find what works for you.
I'd hope you've already done that hence the match, but apparently, some of you are like right-swiping bots when sex is up for grabs. There's no judgment here, but if you want success in the online dating world, you've got to personalize this a little.
The Cute Gif
This approach is brilliant if you've decided not to take my advice on vetting your matches' profile first. Using a cute gif as a conversation starter immediately sets you apart from the influx of 'hi's in their inbox.
You can incorporate any kind of opening line into it and it automatically makes the interaction fun and light-hearted. From a movie character waving at the camera, to an awkwardly cheesy compliment and even a sarcastic icebreaker question; no one can resist the urge to reply to a gif with a gif.
It's cute, we've all accepted it. Bonus points if you did vet the tinder profile and use a gif from a show or movie they like. This type of message is an instant conversation starter about a shared interest right there.
A word of warning though, please do not use the Joey Tribbiani "How you doin'?" gif. It's overused, it's lazy, it's unoriginal, and can we please just leave it behind and move on?
The Self Deprecating Pick-Up Line
We're staying far away from the classics like "aren't you tired from racing through my mind?" or anything with oral sex as the punchline. Those are fine, but by no means do these types of messages stand out or pique any interest.
This one is definitely going to require an acquired taste and, indeed, a specific sense of humor, but I'm talking about using funny opening lines that are so ridiculous (and veering on insane) that they just might work for someone as self deprecating as your lovely self.
If your online dating game is failing, and you've matched with someone you think has your sense of humor, try some variation of:
- "Hey girl, you don't look like you could handle 10 inches, which is great cause I've only got 4."
- "I put the STD in stud. All I need is U."
- "You dropped something. Oh it was just your standards. Hi, I'm *insert name*."
- "You're a door handle, and I'm a belt loop. I can tell we'll get uncomfortably attached."
- "Are you pie? Cause I wanna eat you till I hate myself."
Alright maybe that last one has oral sex as the punchline. But you have to admit, it's a better dating app opener than any of those over-confident proposition pick-up lines. The key to nailing this one is mastering the art of self-awareness. It comes across as witty, humble and shows you don't take life or your ego too seriously.
To the right person it'll be the perfect opening line, so make your first impression so hilariously awful that they can't help but reply.
The Meaningful Connection
Some people are on online dating sites or dating apps because they're looking to form a genuine meaningful connection with someone. One-liners and funny openers might not be your style if you're older, a more serious person or looking for a particular kind of individual.
This is where the best opening line to use would be a real, well-thought-out compliment or conversation starter. Something like:
- Complimenting the Spotify playlist on their Tinder profile. Music is a seriously amazing way to bond with someone and can really say a lot about a person if they put their taste out there. Use that to get to know them and make your opening message an acknowledgment of their good taste or an interesting fact about a song you both like.
- Ask if they know someone you know. This sounds like a weird one, but if you're familiar with the dating app Hinge then you'll know it specifically matches you with friends of your friends on Facebook. A great icebreaker question could be to ask about who you have in common, which in turn could lead to sharing some really great real-life stories.
- Focus on their profile picture. An online dating profile is a showcase of yourself. Some people will put a good amount of work into making sure their images are appealing and easy on the eyes, and you bet they get a slew of lazy comments about what's in their shirt or trousers. Indeed the worst opening line. Woo your match with a first message that focuses on their smile, encapsulating eyes, or great style instead.
The Diverted Attention
Everyone knows that online dating apps and even first dates can call for playing a little hard to get. I'm not talking mind games or negging, that's just full on toxic.
But a tinder opener or any online dating message that begins the conversation with you talking about something completely out of the focus of their profile picture can, for some reason, seriously grab your matches attention.
Dating websites and online dating apps are host to some seriously hot people. I mean seriously hot. These guys, girls, and enbies are likely getting thirsted on daily. In this case, keep your composure and don't spam them with heart eye emojis and compliments.
Playing it cool can pull you out of the crowd, and by making your first message about something other than their face or body can throw off the ego of a hottie and make them feel like you're someone worth chasing. Some funny openers or first moves might look like this:
- Pointing out something in the background of a suggestive or ridiculously hot photo. The intent of those photos is obviously attraction and, understandably - compliments: the backbone of flirting. By diverting your attention away from them (onto a poster, a landmark or a pet) with a little dash of humor and interesting comment, you'll likely throw them off from what they're used to hearing. Where's the fun in feeling chased all the time? They may well enjoy not being fawned over.
- Focus on makeup or accessories. These are small style choices that are meaningful and important to a lot of people. Compliment spam gets old, and focusing on the little details of a person can make you seem observant and make them feel acknowledged.
It's worth noting that compliments are an important part of relationships and online dating apps. It's more than healthy to give and receive compliments with someone you're interested in. But let's be honest, it can be overdone, repetitive, and a little uncomfortable at first for those of us who prefer to avoid outright affection right away.
As I said, the best online dating openers will depend on the kind of person your match is. Making the first move can be daunting and first impressions are important when you want someone to like you.
There's no shame in experimenting with those first messages on whatever dating site you use to find what works for you. The perfect opening line can be anything from self deprecating humor to a grounded compliment on their cool belt.
But for a sure-fire increase in response rate, I strongly suggest that next time, you follow the advice of a seasoned and extremely picky dating site connoisseur like myself and utilize these opener ideas.
Who knows, it may just lead to some fun and exciting first dates. The possibilities are endless, so put your best foot forward and ensure that your first impression lands well!