Everyone wants to fall in love. It's a natural human desire. We all love having people shower us with affection, and we all enjoy having someone care about us. But, unfortunately, love can be a very hard thing to find in our modern world.
Online dating can feel frustrating and fruitless, and it seems like everyone who would make a good partner where we live is already taken.
However, there are certain things you can do to help your odds of finding the man or woman of your dreams.
Things to know
- Make eye contact and use it to release phenylethylamine (PEA) which is a chemical our nervous system creates when we fall in love.
- Smile, be confident and reach out and touch them casually, like on the arm or the face, to help them feel calm and secure.
- Be a good friend; engage your active listening skills to learn about them on a deeper level and build a long-term relationship with them.
Keen to discover more ? Well, there are 8 foolproof ways to make someone fall in love with you — you just have to know how to use them to your advantage. Here they are:
- Make eye contact
- Reach out and touch them
- Engage your active listening skills
- Don’t forget to smile!
- Show them how much you care
- Be a good friend
- Remain confident
- Don’t get too clingy
1. Make eye contact
Believe it or not, people can tell how you feel about them based on the amount of time you spend looking into their eyes. In fact, Harvard psychologist Zick Rubin discovered there is a direct correlation between eye contact and love. Basically, he determined that people who love each other make significantly more eye contact than people who are just engaged in conversation.
Also, the way you look at someone can cause a release of phenylethylamine (PEA), which is a chemical our nervous system creates when we fall in love. Since it's what makes our palms sweat, and our hearts race, it's definitely something you want your romantic partner or potential love interest to experience. So, make sure you keep your eyes on them — it just might help them fall for you.
Unfortunately, many of us struggle with eye contact now because we spend so much time on social media or live with mental health conditions like social anxiety.
So, if eye contact is hard for you, start with small amounts of eye contact then work your way up to looking into people's eyes for longer durations. Also, don't be afraid to cheat a little by looking at other things around their eyes, like their nose or forehead.
This can take some of the pressure off and reduce your anxiety levels while still providing the person with good eye contact.
2. Reach out and touch them
Another thing that many people enjoy is physical touch. Believe it or not, touching someone casually, like on the arm or the face, can help them feel calm and secure. This, in turn, can help them feel closer to you and raise their desire.
Physical touch can also help you connect with them and calm your nerves too, making it a win-win if you want someone to love you.
After all, there's a reason why many people say satisfying relationships involve a healthy combination of emotional intimacy and physical touch.
3. Engage your active listening skills
If you want to build a long-term relationship with someone, then you need to get to know them on a deeper level. This means you're going to need to talk to them and flex those active listening skills that you likely possess.
People who are willing and able to listen to their partner have more successful, loving relationships with their romantic partners. Active listening not only helps the other person feel respected and appreciated, but it helps us gain additional information about the person and see the world through their eyes.
This is not only beneficial to romantic relationships, but any relationship you forge with someone, such as a coworker or a close friend.
If you have a hard time focusing on someone and using active listening skills, you should try practicing them with someone you trust. You can practice by reflecting on what you hear, asking open-ended questions related to what the person said, and remaining patient during short pauses. All of these skills get better the more you practice them, so just keep trying.
4. Don’t forget to smile!
If you've ever seen the Broadway musical "Annie," then you've probably heard the lyrics that say, "You're never fully dressed without a smile." While the song may sound silly, the thought behind the lyrics is actually quite brilliant — and a perfect reminder for anyone looking for love and happiness.
Many researchers say that smiling makes you look more attractive. In fact, it can do so much for your confidence and attraction level that it can actually help hide some of the less appealing physical characteristics of your face and body.
Even those with low self-esteem can feel better about themselves and erase some of that negativity by showing off those pearly whites when they're around someone they find attractive.
So, the next time you're around someone you hope will love you, make sure you smile as much as you can.
5. Show them how much you care
In most romantic relationships, people love receiving signs of affection and care from the other person. Sometimes this comes in the form of active listening or other items mentioned above, but sometimes it comes in other ways, like sending flowers to them at work or picking up their favorite dessert.
Regardless of how you show someone how much you care, chances are the thought you put behind the gesture will go a long way towards sealing the deal for you. Most people can tell when someone truly cares about them and does things out of the kindness of their heart, and these efforts cause us to feel affection and love. So, pick up on what your love interest likes, and show them how much you care.
6. Be a good friend
Sometimes the hardest thing to find in life is a good friend. However, a close friend we can confide in and lean on when we need to is something we all desperately need. So, one way to help someone fall in love with you involves showing up for them as a friend first.
When you offer someone friendship, they see the value you add to their life. They feel supported and see the way in which you help them and positively influence them — and these memories stick with them over time.
They know they can trust you, rely on you, and share anything with you without judgment. These are great qualities that people look for in a healthy relationship, and providing them without hesitation earns you some serious points. In fact, this is probably why nearly 70 percent of all long-lasting romantic relationships start out as friendships.
Obviously building a quality friendship can take time, but if you really want someone to love you, it's absolutely the way to go.
7. Remain confident
Have you ever felt attracted to someone who completely lacks confidence and seems to suffer from low-self esteem? Well, sadly, probably not. That's because we're instinctively programmed to find confidence, not the lack thereof, attractive in a potential partner.
Confidence helps you appear more driven, put together, and physically appealing. It shows that you know who you are, and it gives you the appearance of having knowledge and leadership qualities.
While arrogance can be a major turnoff, a healthy dose of confidence can help someone fall for you much faster than they will if you appear unsure of yourself.
8. Don’t get too clingy
While ghosting has arguably become the worst new trend to hit the dating scene, absence still makes the heart grow fonder. Therefore, you want to make sure you don't come on too strong too quickly in your quest for love, but instead, create enough space so that you don't appear "clingy" or "too attached."
Furthermore, people often want what they can't have, and that holds true when it comes to everything from a new pair of shoes to a romantic partner. So, if you really want someone to fall in love with you, it may help if you make yourself unavailable every once in a while (or at least create the appearance that you're busy and "hard to catch.")
Remember: if it’s meant to be, it will happen
When we're desperate to find love, we're often willing to go to great lengths to make anyone and everyone fall for us. However, unrequited love is still a thing, and it can absolutely crush us if we pursue someone who has no interest in us whatsoever.
So, all these tips and tricks aside, remember this: if a relationship is meant to be, it will happen with time. You can call it fate, you can call it soul mates or you can simply say it's manifestation. Regardless, true love happens for those who are willing to work for it and willing to wait.
We all want someone to love us, and, no matter who you are, I promise the right person is out there for you. Good things just come to those who wait, so keep up the good work and be patient.