Breakups are often painful and unsettling, especially if you still have feelings for the other person. In fact, you may find that you still miss your ex months after you broke up, and you want to get back together. But is that even possible?
Well, in many cases, couples who share a strong connection can rekindle their romance even after they break up. However, the key to unlocking that happiness starts with answering a very simple question: Does my ex still love me?
Unfortunately, that doesn't always seem like an easy question to answer, especially if your breakup was less than pretty. But don't lose hope just yet, because there's a good chance your ex-boyfriend could still be in love with you just like you're in love with him.
Things to know
- If your ex still follows you on social media and occasionally likes the photos you post on Instagram or watches your TikTok videos, then chances are he's still into you.
- If he still talks to your loved ones, or asks friends about you, chances are he's doing it so he can stay closer to you or gain some kind of insight into your life.
- Staying in contact with you, getting jealous and not wanting to date anyone are all definite signs he still has feelings.
If you can relate to some of the signs above, there's hope yet. To help you figure out if he still loves you, here are the signs we'll be looking out for:
- He still follows you on social media
- He still talks to your loved ones
- He texts or calls you - just because
- He brings up old memories
- He isn’t dating anyone
- He’s rebounding hard
- He seems jealous
- He’s focused on self-improvement
- He asks you for advice
- He admits he misses you
- He seems excited when he sees you
- He asks people how you’re doing
- His friends say he’s miserable
- He apologizes for the past
- He confesses his feelings
What If I Think He Still Loves Me?
Sometimes breakups happen even when we still love someone. We can lose our temper and lash out, then make hasty decisions that we don't really mean. Or, we can love someone but feel like the timing is off due to other aspects of our lives. Other times we really want to be with a person, but we know they aren't ready for the commitment we want just yet.
Regardless of the reasoning behind the breakup, you may still love your ex-boyfriend. If so, you may be thinking, "I wonder if he still loves me too?"
Unfortunately, figuring out if an ex-boyfriend still loves you can be difficult at best. He may be sending you mixed signals and leaving you confused. Or, he may be flirting with you but not letting things go any further.
All of this can frustrate you and make your head spin. And yet, at the same time, it can also be giving you the clues you need to determine if he still loves you.
15 Signs He Still Loves You
You may think your ex-boyfriend still loves you because you still have strong feelings. However, it's better to have facts than opinions before making a move. So how can you answer the question, "Does he still love me?"
Luckily, these 15 actions are undeniable signs that he still loves you.
1. He still follows you on social media
Most people unfollow their exes on social media after the breakup is official. So, if your ex still follows you and occasionally likes the photos you post on Instagram or watches your TikTok videos, then chances are he's still into you.
If you post on social media frequently, following you is a way for your ex-boyfriend to keep an eye on you and see how you're coping with life. It may seem like a little thing, but he still thinks about you, and that's actually a pretty big deal.
2. He still talks to your loved ones
Even if your ex shared a strong connection with some of your friends and family members, there isn't a reason for him to stay in touch with them after the breakup. If he does, chances are he's doing it so he can stay closer to you or gain some kind of insight into your life.
If you share a mutual friend, you could always ask them if your ex still loves you. They may spill the beans if you ask nicely.
3. He texts or calls you - just because
Most partners make a concerted effort not to talk to each other after they split up. So if your ex stays in contact with you, it's a definite sign he still has feelings.
He may call or message you to share something that made him think of you, or he may just call to chat. Either way, try to pick his brain a little to see if he still cares. You can ask him questions and gauge his reaction.
4. He brings up old memories
Nostalgia can trigger strong emotional reactions in people who previously dated. So, if your ex is bringing up old memories, then it's another definite sign he's holding onto some feelings.
He may text you little things he remembers about your relationship and send you pictures of places around town you used to go to together. He may even make a consistent effort to remember important dates or bring up past events that you two enjoyed together. It's all part of the plan.
5. He isn’t dating anyone
Everyone has different ways of healing after a breakup and moving on with their lives. However, most people eventually enter a new relationship — unless they hold onto their feelings. Usually, you can find out if he's dating someone new by scoping out his social media profiles or asking a mutual friend.
6. He’s rebounding hard
Inversely, some people channel their hurt feelings into rebound relationships and hit the dating pool hard and heavy. This is often just a tactic to make you jealous or help them cope with the heartache of losing you — both of which are definite signs that your ex-boyfriend still loves you.
7. He seems jealous
Is your ex having strong emotional reactions to social media posts of you in a new relationship? Is he using aggressive body language towards guys who make sexual advances toward you when he sees you in public?
These little things may frustrate you, but they're also signs of jealousy. If your ex-boyfriend is jealous of the attention other guys are giving you, then he probably still has feelings for you.
8. He’s focused on self-improvement
Does it seem like your ex-boyfriend is trying to do all the right things and make himself a better person in the aftermath of your breakup? If you broke up with him due to some issue that he's now addressing on his own, then chances are he's doing it in hopes of winning you back.
9. He asks you for advice
It's not uncommon for people to stay in contact after they break up. However, most people don't stay friends with their ex and ask them for advice. This is something most people reserve for a close friend or romantic partner, not an ex they barely talk to.
Usually, if an ex still considers you their go-to person, it's a definite sign that they still love you. People only seek advice from someone they truly trust. They want someone who will give them their undivided attention and provide the best possible advice.
10. He admits he misses you
Saying, "I miss you," can mean many different things to different people. Sometimes we all miss our best friends and other loved ones if we haven't seen them in a while.
However, if your former boyfriend says he misses you, it usually signifies something more. In fact, it could mean something more like, "I love my ex, but I don't know how to tell her."
11. He seems excited when he sees you
Many of us run into exes in various places around town after we break up with them. However, a lot of us also intentionally hide from our exes because we don't want to go through that whole awkward conversation bit that comes when you run into an ex.
However, it's not nearly as awkward to run into someone you still love. If your ex still likes you, he probably seems excited to see you and may even look like he's fighting temptations to hug you or show other signs of physical affection.
12. He asks people how you’re doing
When we love someone, we usually want to know how they are. So, if your ex still has feelings for you, he may ask other people how you're doing so he can know. He may be too scared to ask you, or he may feel uncertain about how you'll react.
This may also happen if you're still in a no-contact period. He may desperately want to know how you're doing, but he doesn't want to jeopardize future chances with you. So instead, he may ask other people how you are so he can get the information without talking to you directly.
13. His friends say he’s miserable
Guys often like to give the illusion of having it all together even when they don't. This is especially true in the aftermath of a breakup. On the exterior, your ex may seem like he's doing great and moving on from you. But inside, he may be falling apart.
In these instances, his friends may reach out to you and tell you he's not doing well. They may even share how he feels about you in hopes that you'll take him back.
14. He apologizes for the past
We're all human beings who make mistakes sometimes. However, if an ex-boyfriend goes out of his way to do the right thing and apologize to you for things he did in the past, he's probably trying to make amends. He may want to re-establish trust with you, show you he's changed, and prove he's good enough to have you back.
Now, whether you forgive him or not is up to you. It may depend if what your ex apologized for is something he shouldn't have done in the first place or if it was an honest mistake.
15. He confesses his feelings
It's one thing if your ex-boyfriend has thoughts about getting back together. However, it's a much bigger deal if he tells you directly to your face (or in text messages) that he still has feelings for you. This is the most definite sign that he still loves you.
What Should I Do If He Still Loves Me?
Now that you know how to determine if your ex still loves you, it's time to decide what you'll do with that information. This will require some soul-searching because you will need to determine if you want to try to get back together or not.
You may want to make a pros and cons list to help you determine this, then be prepared to move on either way.
If you still love your ex and believe he still loves you, you can start a conversation with him to gauge his interest level. You could also send a quick text and suggest a coffee date to catch up and see where the conversation leads. Either way, go into it with the mindset that you'll be okay regardless of what happens.
Breakups don't always have to last forever. In fact, many people figure out how to get their ex back and enjoy a happy, loving relationship the second time around. As long as you both love each other and are willing to do what it takes to make the relationship work, then it's all going to be okay.