Maybe you’ve noticed a subtle change in the way he looks at you. Perhaps your interactions have become more flirty than platonic. Could there be something more to all the lingering touches?
If your male friend is planning a grand escape from the friend zone, he’ll try to be sneaky about it. Let’s face it; there’s a lot at stake if you don’t feel the same way. Asking him about his feelings would certainly clear things up, but things could get pretty awkward if you’ve misjudged the situation.
Things to know
- Signs that a male friend may have romantic feelings for you include confiding in and trusting your judgment, wanting to spend quality time with you alone, being interested in your life and personal experiences, and finding you funny.
- A man with romantic feelings for you may avoid discussing his past relationships and may offer to pay for things when you spend time together.
- Some red flags to look out for include him not remembering small details about you and not being genuinely interested in your life and experiences.
If you’re wondering how to know for sure that he sees you as more than a friend, I’m here to give you a few pointers. Here’s exactly what we’ll be looking at:
- Signs He Likes You More Than A Friend
- Reading His Body Language
- Texting Signs
- Signs He Only Sees You As A Friend
- He’s More Than A Friend, Now What?
Simple Signs He Likes You More Than A Friend
Does he see you as a friend or does he wish you were something more? Here's how to tell if he likes you more than a friend:
1. He trusts and values your judgment
If he needs to talk, you're the first person he'll turn to. Whether it’s a work-related matter or something personal, he’ll seek out your opinion. Confiding in you and trusting your judgment are great signs that he thinks the world of you.
Think about how he reacts when you share your opinion with him. Does he seem genuinely interested in what you have to say? If he shows you that he cares what you think, he sees you as more than a close friend.
Being vulnerable with you is one of the most significant signs that he’s thinking about you in a romantic way. If he didn’t see you as more than a friend, he wouldn’t be interested in building a deeper emotional connection with you.
He’ll avoid bringing up past relationships and exes if he has romantic feelings for you. In fact, he'll avoid talking about his love life altogether. Save for the fact that he's single; you won't know anything else. A blow-by-blow account of all his failed relationships might affect how you see him as a potential romantic partner, so he simply won't risk it.
2. He wants to spend quality time with you
Wanting to spend all his time with you is an obvious sign that he has romantic feelings for you. When he sees you as more than his best friend, he'll go out of his way to make sure you're inseparable. Whether it's daily drinks or weekend plans, he'll want to take up all of your free time.
If he really likes you, he won't just spring plans on you; he'll ask you days or weeks in advance. And he'll make it clear that he wants to spend quality time with you. Mutual friends won't be invited.
Even though he doesn’t call them dates, they’ll feel like dates. He’ll offer to pick you up and do other gentlemanly things. He’ll go out of his way to look and smell good. Instead of splitting the bill like friends do, he'll offer to foot the bill every single time.
3. He's interested in your life
A man who sees you as more than a friend will want to know every little thing about you. It won't be the typical things a casual friend might want to know. He'll ask you deeper questions about your childhood and seek to understand how your experiences have shaped who you are today.
Whether it’s your career or your personal life, he'll have plenty of in-depth questions for you. Your hopes and dreams will fascinate him. As will your future plans.
He’ll want to talk with you for hours about your interests and the things that matter to you. When his feelings run deeper than friendship, he'll want to form a meaningful emotional connection with you. His curiosity will be genuine, and his interest in you will be much higher than your other male friends.
How much he remembers is another clue. If he seems to remember even the small things you tell him, he's emotionally invested. Higher levels of emotional investment are associated with romantic interest. So you can be sure he sees you as more than a friend.
4. He thinks you're funny
You’re hardly a world-class comedian, but when you’re around, he simply can't stop doubling over and complimenting you on your killer sense of humor.
If he's attracted to you in a romantic way, he's more likely to find your humor funny. Studies show that we tend to be attracted to people who can make us laugh. And for good reason: shared laughter fosters intimacy in romantic relationships and is a sign of good chemistry.
Research also shows that being able to laugh together is a sign of romantic compatibility. So, if you share the same sense of humor and even have a few inside jokes, something deeper than friendship might develop between you.
5. He's still single
He's a great catch, and you know any woman would be lucky to have him. But he's off the market. Not because he's taken, but because he just doesn't seem interested in any other woman besides you.
If he's single and chooses to spend all his time with you, he might be trying to communicate that only you will do. Could you be missing the signs? Pay attention to how he behaves around other women. If he barely pays them a second glance but gets all flirty with you, he's totally into you.
Does he talk about how good your relationship is and how he always has the best time with you? Well, he could be sneakily saying that he thinks you’d make a great couple.
6. He's overly interested in your love life
When he has deeper feelings for you, your love life will come up often. He'll be interested in whether you're seeing anyone or if there are any romantic prospects on your radar.
He might even ask probing questions about what you want in a partner or relationship. If you're seeing someone new, you may notice subtle changes in his behavior. He might be moody and withdrawn.
He might even avoid you. He could even have difficulty keeping his opinions about your new romantic interest to himself. Jealousy is an obvious sign that he sees you as more than a friend.
7. He's keen to be your plus one
It makes sense that he'd be excited to check out your favorite band. He definitely wouldn't mind being your date for a fancy event with an open bar.
But, if you’ve dragged him to some of the weirdest places and he’s still keen to show up by your side, it’s safe to say he adores you. From mundane tasks like shopping to dentist appointments, you can count on him to be by your side.
8. He’s proud to show you off
Asking you to be his plus one for work and family events signals that he's proud to have you on his arm. You can be sure he enjoys your company too.
If he's showing you off to his family members, he definitely sees you as someone he wants in his life for the long haul.
Take note of how he introduces you. If he lets everyone come to their own conclusions about your relationship, that’s a not-so-subtle clue that he might be interested in being more than your friend.
9. He goes out of his way to help you
When he sees you as more than a friend, he'll go out of his way to do things for you. If you even mention something that needs fixing, he's on it before you can finish your sentence. This is a subtle sign that he is already trying to take on the role of 'protector' in your life.
10. He notices the little things
A guy friend who sees you as a buddy probably won't pay much attention to your appearance. However, a male friend who's smitten will notice every little thing.
As he spends all his time staring at you, he'll be the first to compliment you on your new haircut or tell you how good your new dress looks.
He won't just notice changes in your appearance; he'll see changes in your mood too. If you're down, he'll try to make you feel better. When you're excited about something, he'll be right there cheering you on.
Reading His Body Language
Reading his body language is a great way to tell if he has more than friendly feelings for you. Body language is mainly instinctive, so he'll have difficulty hiding his true feelings.
First, establish how he generally behaves. Observe his typical posture and facial expressions. This will help you pick up on any subtle changes in his feelings for you.
Remember to look out for multiple clues. The more you can find, the better. Study his body language, facial expressions, and use of space. Pay attention to major tells like intense eye contact and physical contact. Here are a few more things to look out for:
11. His face is very expressive
Men tend to get animated around women they like. If his facial expression is more expressive, that's a clear sign that he's into you. Look out for flared nostrils, slightly parted lips, and raised eyebrows. More importantly, pay attention to his smile.
A smile that shows off the upper teeth is often associated with friendship. A full smile that exposes both the top and bottom teeth is most commonly associated with romantic interest.
If he can't seem to wipe the smile off his face whenever you're around, he’s flirting. He's also unconsciously trying to raise his attractiveness, meaning he probably finds you attractive too.
12. His eyes light up when he sees you
If he looks at you like you're the best thing to ever happen to him, he's smitten. When he sees you as more than a friend, he won't just pay you the occasional glance; he'll stare at you intently.
His gaze might drift from your lips to your chest and back to your face. He might bite or lick his lips. If he isn't a shy guy, he might even punctuate his stares with compliments like "you look amazing" or "you're so beautiful."
13. He mirrors your behavior
Next time you’re together, watch out for mirroring. Mirroring is when someone unconsciously mimics your speech and body language. It shows engagement and, in some cases, romantic attraction.
If he instinctively copies your gestures and how you speak, he likes you. So be on the lookout for subtle things, like leaning in when you do or using words that you like to use.
14. He likes to keep close
If he touches you whenever he has a chance, then he's probably trying to get closer to his crush. He might try to put his arm around you or hold your hand when you're out in public.
Even with ample seating space, he’ll want to sit as close to you as possible. If he can’t, his feet will be pointed toward you, and the rest of his body will lean in your direction.
When we like someone, we tend to text them more often. We're also more mindful of how we come across. If he's feeling you in a non-platonic way, his texting habits will reflect it. Here are a few things to look out for:
15. He texts you all the time
Your day starts off with a text from him, and he keeps you posted on what he's doing throughout the day. It's not unusual for him to randomly ask you what you're up to.
He might even be interested in how your day is going. Whether he's doing something cool or just carrying on with everyday life, you're always the first to know. If he's constantly initiating contact with you, he sees you as more than a friend.
16. He’s engaged
It's not unusual to take time to get back to friends. With potential love interests, there's more urgency. If you're texting each other back and forth several times a day and he's chasing you, he's into you.
A man with strong feelings for you will try to avoid choppy or awkward conversations. He'll be fully invested and engaged instead. He might even take the engagement over to social media. He’ll like your posts, fill up your comments section, or share a funny meme with you.
17. He sticks to safe text topics
If he adores you, he'll avoid gross topics. He won't text you like one of the guys. He'll put more care and effort into what he says. How you see him is important, so he's likely to play it safe. He'll lean towards your interests and keep you talking about yourself.
Red Flags You Are In The Friend-zone
If he’s ever given you the whole “I see you as a sister” speech, take his word for it. Here are more signs that you’ll probably never be more than friends:
1. He sets you up with his friends
When he sees you as a friend, he won't mind giving you pointers on how to get with the office cutie. Like any well-meaning friend, he might even set you up on a few dates. Instead of being jealous or weird about the prospect of you seeing other guys, he'll support you. He wants to see you win—just not with him.
2. He only texts when he's bored
If he sees you as a friend, he might not feel the need to chat with you all the time. There's much less pressure for him to stay in contact with you. Some days he’ll message you, and on other days you might not hear from him at all. In fact, he might wait for you to reach out to him.
3. He has annoying pet names for you
He has all sorts of names for you, but they aren't exactly the romantic kind. They aren’t even cute or endearing.
On most days, you’re lucky if you can even get a ‘hey’ out of him. He usually leads with ‘bro’ or ‘dude,’ and that’s if he hasn’t come up with a nickname tied to some embarrassing story. He treats you like one of the guys because, in his mind, you really are.
4. He asks you for relationship advice
Does he share everything about his tinder dates? Are you his unofficial relationship advisor? Telling you all the gory details about his love life screams friend zone.
This is another obvious sign that he sees no romantic future with you. If he's talking to you about other women and even asking you for advice, he sees you as his trusted compadre.
5. He's comfortable around you
A guy who sees you as a buddy won't feel the need to impress you, so he's less likely to dress up when you make plans. You've probably seen him at his worst, and it isn't something he seems to mind.
Spending time together is usually a relaxed affair. You hang out and stick to small talk. He might even joke around with you in that annoying way guy friends do.
6. He introduces you as his friend
When he sees you as his friend, he'll introduce you as his friend. If you get mistaken for a cute couple, he won’t hesitate to set the record straight.
While he’s comfortable being close to you when there's no one around, when you’re out together, he’ll keep his distance—especially when attractive women are around. He’ll do this to let them know that he’s available for the taking.
He’s More Than A Friend, Now What?
Research confirms it: friendship lays the foundation for stronger, more satisfying romantic relationships. If you share a strong mutual attraction, throw caution to the wind, go for it and let him know you like him. You may very well be on the path to lasting love.